MPPT3K Guest Submission:
Charity's Adventure Part 1
Hey Everybody/Everypony! ReluctantBrohoof here! Today, I’m going to be riffing a story called “Charity’s adventure”, a fic about religion invading Ponyville. One thing worth noting, this fic was written by someone who knows VERY little about the show itself.
Kill me now.
___
(Twilight and Rarity walk into Author’s studio)
Twilight: Author! Author!
Author: *Hack! Cough! Cough!* Oh, hey there.
Rarity: Author, are you okay? You sound simply dreadful!
Author: Yeah, *sniff*, I think I caught the flu…
Pinkie (from TV): Oh, that’s too bad! I had this great story for you guys to riff, but I guess if you’re sick, I can’t make you…
Twilight: well, if we aren’t doing a MPPT3K, I guess we’ll just-
(Doors slam shut and lock.)
Twilight: Be… Going…
Rarity: But Pinkie, you just said that you wouldn’t make us read anything Without Author!!
Pinkie: No, I said I couldn’t make Author read! I can still grab a replacement for him! Give me a minute!
(Pinkie disappears off screen, and a series of pinging and clanging noises can be heard. A trapdoor opens overhead, and a young man falls through, screaming like a little girl.)
Man: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-*THUNK*
Twilight: Well, that’s new. And you are?
Man: Oww… Oh, uh, you can call me RB. What’s going on?
Pinkie: No time to explain, let’s get started! Here’s “Charity’s Adventure!
(Buzzer sounds)
Twilight and Rarity: We got story sign!
RB: wait, did she say…?
___
Charity's Adventure Part 1
RB: No, no, anything but this!
Twilight: You’ve read this?
RB: Yes, and I went through an entire crate of brain bleach afterwards.
by ~Ebony-Brown
Author's note/ Hey, this is my first fan-fiction I've written by myself, so please don't criticize it.
Rarity: Don’t worry, we will anyway.
I like to thanks Thomas Brown for spellchecking this,
Twilight: He didn’t do a very good job, did he?
and to Jesus for giving me inspiration.
RB: Times like these I’m glad I’m an atheist…
Charity Sue Mets the other Ponies
Charity-Sue was new in Pony-Ville so she didn't know that many people there. She was a good Christian Pony and had known Jesus for most of her life. She never took drugs and never had any sex (that was because she was planning to wait to get married first.
RB: A mary-sue with “sue” in the name. Poor planning or coincidence?
Rarity: The world may never know.
The most important thing was that she had never practised magic at all and this was because Moses told us in the Bible that we should not suffer a witch and that Paul told his followers to burn all books about witchcraft.
Twilight: WHAT!?
She decided to go to Pony-Ville about the true way of Christ and how magic is really evil.
Twilight: WHAT!?!? (Twilight’s mane starts to smoke)
Rarity: Calm down, Twilight.
The first person Charity-Sue met in Pony-Ville was Twilight Sparkle. The unicorn was purple, even her hair, although she had pink streaks in it. She also had a pink star on her butt.
She was studying a pile of books. Charity-Sue wasn't sure what books they were, but she decided to ask Twilight Sparkle what book they were.
RB: Pointless sentence is pointless.
"Hello, my name is Charity-Sue," she said. "Would you be able to tell me what this books you are reading is about?"
"Hello Charity-Sue," said Twilight Sparkle. "This book is about the history of Pony-Ville and how Princess Celestica
RB: Sister of Trollestia, and distant cousin of Molestia.
managed to build Pony-Ville with her sister Princess Luna. But Princess Luna went crazy and tried to take over the world. She was sent to the moon before trying to come back. But she is all good again."
Twilight: That isn’t what happened… at all…
"Wow," said Charity-Sue. She was very interested in what Twilight Sparkle was reading. But the most interesting thing she wanted to know is if Pony-Ville practised Christianity or not.
Rarity: Yes, because whenever I travel to a new town, the first thing I want to know is what religion they practice there.
RB: Who doesn’t?
"Just wondering though, at any point in Pony-Ville's history, has any of you ever practice Christianity?"
"Christianity?" asked Twilight Sparkle. She looked very confused as if she didn't knew what Charity-Sue was talking about. "What is that about? Is that about crisps?"
All: …
Twilight: …Was that supposed to be funny?
Charity-Sue was shocked at what she was saying, but she decided to forgive. It wasn't her fault that no one had ever told her about Jesus and the sacrifice he made for us all.
RB: Oh, look! A Christian forgiving someone for not being the same as them!
Rarity: How rare!
"Christianity is all about the sacrifice that Jesus made for us by dying on the cross. By doing this, he allowed us to have eternal life, but only if we followed his holy commandments. These commandments were given to us a thousand years before that but people ignored it. Jesus came back to remind us about the commitment of God. What do you think of that," Charity-Sue explained.
Twilight: I think you’re nuts!
Twilight Sparkle eyes sparkled up just like her namesake. She looked really interested in Christianity.
"Wow, that is very interested," she told Charity-Sue.
Twilight: Maybe you should go bother him instead!
RB: Cue Twilight being Ooc in 3… 2… 1…
"Let's go to Princess Celestica to tell her all about this great thing called Jesus. Wow, you have really changed my life."
Twilight Sparkle galloped to the castle,
Rarity: Wow, you galloped all the way to the castle? I didn’t know you had it in you, Twilight!
with Charity-Sue tagging along. She wanted to go with Twilight Sparkle so that she could find out why they hadn't practice Christianity before. She feared that something evil had taken control of Pony-Ville the day that it was formed and it is this evil that stopped them from practising Christianity.
RB: Yes, the unspeakable evil that is… Common sense!
"This is the castle where Princess Celestica lives. Be very careful around her for she can be very unpredictable," said Twilight Sparkle
Rarity: This one time, I went into the throne room, and she was wearing a banana suit!
, flushing
RB: Why?
Rarity: Twilight, is there something you haven’t been telling us?
. Charity-Sue could tell that Twilight Sparkle hero worshiped Princess Celestica. She hoped that one day Twilight Sparkle would also worship Jesus Christ. This was because Jesus Christ has done more for than anyone else in this world.
Twilight: …What does that even mean?
They then entered the throne room and there was Princess Celestica. She was a white unicorn
Twilight: What happened to her wings?
Pinkie (from TV): Oh, I needed to make cupcakes, but I was out of my special ingredient…
All: DON’T. REFERENCE. THAT. FANFIC!
just like Twilight Sparkle but her hair ware of different pastel colours. These colours included light blue, a limy green, a purple much like Twilight Sparkle's skin, and a light pinkie
Rarity: Pinkie, get out of the Princess’ hair.
colour which looked very girly. She had a sun on her butt.
RB: Dat butt.
"Hey, Princess Celestica, I've got some cool news to tell you. I've just today found out about a really cool person," said Twilight Sparkle excitedly.
"And who is this person? Please tell me," she asked Twilight Sparkle.
"This person is
RB: Chuck Testa!
Jesus Christ" said Twilight Sparkle proudly. Suddenly, Princess Celestica turned to dark and her eyes started to glow red. Extra horns started to grown, and her skin when a dark brown colour
"Leave this room at once," she said in a very low and sinister voice.
All: …
Twilight: Did they just…?
RB: Yes. You see why I was so upset earlier?
Suddenly some evil spell came upon Twilight Sparkle and Charity-Sue. This evil spell transported them off the castle and into the evil woods
Rarity: Next to the evil river, which ran down from the evil mountain, which was home to evil goats, who ate evil grass, which-
RB: stop.
, which sinister looking trees staring at them. And unlike the other trees, these trees cannot be convinced into not doing evil deeds to them.
Twilight: There are trees that can be convinced not to do evil deeds?
Author's note/ I hope you liked that chapter. I will upload another chapter when I have spared time and after helping Thomas write his fan-fiction. Bye and God bless!
___
Twilight: Well, at least it’s over.
Pinkie: Did you have fun?
All: NO.
Pinkie: Oh, that’s too bad. Dashie, push the button!
(Dash pushes the button. The doors unlock, and the TV turns off.)
RB: Oh, phew. I’m glad she didn’t make us read the other chapters.
(The doors slam shut and lock, and the TV turns back on.)
Pinkie: There are other chapters?!
RB: …Shit…
Kill me now.
___
(Twilight and Rarity walk into Author’s studio)
Twilight: Author! Author!
Author: *Hack! Cough! Cough!* Oh, hey there.
Rarity: Author, are you okay? You sound simply dreadful!
Author: Yeah, *sniff*, I think I caught the flu…
Pinkie (from TV): Oh, that’s too bad! I had this great story for you guys to riff, but I guess if you’re sick, I can’t make you…
Twilight: well, if we aren’t doing a MPPT3K, I guess we’ll just-
(Doors slam shut and lock.)
Twilight: Be… Going…
Rarity: But Pinkie, you just said that you wouldn’t make us read anything Without Author!!
Pinkie: No, I said I couldn’t make Author read! I can still grab a replacement for him! Give me a minute!
(Pinkie disappears off screen, and a series of pinging and clanging noises can be heard. A trapdoor opens overhead, and a young man falls through, screaming like a little girl.)
Man: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-*THUNK*
Twilight: Well, that’s new. And you are?
Man: Oww… Oh, uh, you can call me RB. What’s going on?
Pinkie: No time to explain, let’s get started! Here’s “Charity’s Adventure!
(Buzzer sounds)
Twilight and Rarity: We got story sign!
RB: wait, did she say…?
___
Charity's Adventure Part 1
RB: No, no, anything but this!
Twilight: You’ve read this?
RB: Yes, and I went through an entire crate of brain bleach afterwards.
by ~Ebony-Brown
Author's note/ Hey, this is my first fan-fiction I've written by myself, so please don't criticize it.
Rarity: Don’t worry, we will anyway.
I like to thanks Thomas Brown for spellchecking this,
Twilight: He didn’t do a very good job, did he?
and to Jesus for giving me inspiration.
RB: Times like these I’m glad I’m an atheist…
Charity Sue Mets the other Ponies
Charity-Sue was new in Pony-Ville so she didn't know that many people there. She was a good Christian Pony and had known Jesus for most of her life. She never took drugs and never had any sex (that was because she was planning to wait to get married first.
RB: A mary-sue with “sue” in the name. Poor planning or coincidence?
Rarity: The world may never know.
The most important thing was that she had never practised magic at all and this was because Moses told us in the Bible that we should not suffer a witch and that Paul told his followers to burn all books about witchcraft.
Twilight: WHAT!?
She decided to go to Pony-Ville about the true way of Christ and how magic is really evil.
Twilight: WHAT!?!? (Twilight’s mane starts to smoke)
Rarity: Calm down, Twilight.
The first person Charity-Sue met in Pony-Ville was Twilight Sparkle. The unicorn was purple, even her hair, although she had pink streaks in it. She also had a pink star on her butt.
She was studying a pile of books. Charity-Sue wasn't sure what books they were, but she decided to ask Twilight Sparkle what book they were.
RB: Pointless sentence is pointless.
"Hello, my name is Charity-Sue," she said. "Would you be able to tell me what this books you are reading is about?"
"Hello Charity-Sue," said Twilight Sparkle. "This book is about the history of Pony-Ville and how Princess Celestica
RB: Sister of Trollestia, and distant cousin of Molestia.
managed to build Pony-Ville with her sister Princess Luna. But Princess Luna went crazy and tried to take over the world. She was sent to the moon before trying to come back. But she is all good again."
Twilight: That isn’t what happened… at all…
"Wow," said Charity-Sue. She was very interested in what Twilight Sparkle was reading. But the most interesting thing she wanted to know is if Pony-Ville practised Christianity or not.
Rarity: Yes, because whenever I travel to a new town, the first thing I want to know is what religion they practice there.
RB: Who doesn’t?
"Just wondering though, at any point in Pony-Ville's history, has any of you ever practice Christianity?"
"Christianity?" asked Twilight Sparkle. She looked very confused as if she didn't knew what Charity-Sue was talking about. "What is that about? Is that about crisps?"
All: …
Twilight: …Was that supposed to be funny?
Charity-Sue was shocked at what she was saying, but she decided to forgive. It wasn't her fault that no one had ever told her about Jesus and the sacrifice he made for us all.
RB: Oh, look! A Christian forgiving someone for not being the same as them!
Rarity: How rare!
"Christianity is all about the sacrifice that Jesus made for us by dying on the cross. By doing this, he allowed us to have eternal life, but only if we followed his holy commandments. These commandments were given to us a thousand years before that but people ignored it. Jesus came back to remind us about the commitment of God. What do you think of that," Charity-Sue explained.
Twilight: I think you’re nuts!
Twilight Sparkle eyes sparkled up just like her namesake. She looked really interested in Christianity.
"Wow, that is very interested," she told Charity-Sue.
Twilight: Maybe you should go bother him instead!
RB: Cue Twilight being Ooc in 3… 2… 1…
"Let's go to Princess Celestica to tell her all about this great thing called Jesus. Wow, you have really changed my life."
Twilight Sparkle galloped to the castle,
Rarity: Wow, you galloped all the way to the castle? I didn’t know you had it in you, Twilight!
with Charity-Sue tagging along. She wanted to go with Twilight Sparkle so that she could find out why they hadn't practice Christianity before. She feared that something evil had taken control of Pony-Ville the day that it was formed and it is this evil that stopped them from practising Christianity.
RB: Yes, the unspeakable evil that is… Common sense!
"This is the castle where Princess Celestica lives. Be very careful around her for she can be very unpredictable," said Twilight Sparkle
Rarity: This one time, I went into the throne room, and she was wearing a banana suit!
, flushing
RB: Why?
Rarity: Twilight, is there something you haven’t been telling us?
. Charity-Sue could tell that Twilight Sparkle hero worshiped Princess Celestica. She hoped that one day Twilight Sparkle would also worship Jesus Christ. This was because Jesus Christ has done more for than anyone else in this world.
Twilight: …What does that even mean?
They then entered the throne room and there was Princess Celestica. She was a white unicorn
Twilight: What happened to her wings?
Pinkie (from TV): Oh, I needed to make cupcakes, but I was out of my special ingredient…
All: DON’T. REFERENCE. THAT. FANFIC!
just like Twilight Sparkle but her hair ware of different pastel colours. These colours included light blue, a limy green, a purple much like Twilight Sparkle's skin, and a light pinkie
Rarity: Pinkie, get out of the Princess’ hair.
colour which looked very girly. She had a sun on her butt.
RB: Dat butt.
"Hey, Princess Celestica, I've got some cool news to tell you. I've just today found out about a really cool person," said Twilight Sparkle excitedly.
"And who is this person? Please tell me," she asked Twilight Sparkle.
"This person is
RB: Chuck Testa!
Jesus Christ" said Twilight Sparkle proudly. Suddenly, Princess Celestica turned to dark and her eyes started to glow red. Extra horns started to grown, and her skin when a dark brown colour
"Leave this room at once," she said in a very low and sinister voice.
All: …
Twilight: Did they just…?
RB: Yes. You see why I was so upset earlier?
Suddenly some evil spell came upon Twilight Sparkle and Charity-Sue. This evil spell transported them off the castle and into the evil woods
Rarity: Next to the evil river, which ran down from the evil mountain, which was home to evil goats, who ate evil grass, which-
RB: stop.
, which sinister looking trees staring at them. And unlike the other trees, these trees cannot be convinced into not doing evil deeds to them.
Twilight: There are trees that can be convinced not to do evil deeds?
Author's note/ I hope you liked that chapter. I will upload another chapter when I have spared time and after helping Thomas write his fan-fiction. Bye and God bless!
___
Twilight: Well, at least it’s over.
Pinkie: Did you have fun?
All: NO.
Pinkie: Oh, that’s too bad. Dashie, push the button!
(Dash pushes the button. The doors unlock, and the TV turns off.)
RB: Oh, phew. I’m glad she didn’t make us read the other chapters.
(The doors slam shut and lock, and the TV turns back on.)
Pinkie: There are other chapters?!
RB: …Shit…