MPPT3K Guest Submission:
What Lurks Within the Shadows (A Requiem of Darkness)
Hey bronies, RatherHomely here with another guest submission, this time by UristMcBrony. I won't ramble on for long, but today's story is an odd gore story, that utterly fails at being scary. Similar to "New Tricks", this is too brief and poorly written to actually obtain even a tiny emotional rise out of the reader. Gore wise, well... There's gore. No detail accompanying it. Squeamish readers, trust me, you'll be fine.
Author’s note: As this fic is written in imitation of classic text MST style, it can be somewhat odd to read if you’ve no experience with the type of fiction. Text in parentheses is description of events and locations. Dialogue, rather than being in quotes, is preceded by the speaker’s name and a colon. Not their colon, that would be disgusting. The actual text of the original fanfiction is proceeded on each line by a > mark.
(View of exterior of Ponyville library)
(...Noises... audible)
Discord: Well, it seems dear Celly is occupied at the moment. This should be a perfect opportunity to get my revenge and send her and her friends TO THE MOOONNN!
(Discord walks towards library, camera remains static.)
(Animated intro begins.)
In a parallel dimension
Filled with ponies
There was a mare named Twilight
Not too different from you or me
She lived in a town called Ponyville
And learned about the magic of friendship
She did a fine job and made lots of friends
But Discord didn’t like her so he sent her to the mooon...
(Discord)
I’ll send her cheesy fanfic
The worst I can find
She’ll just have to read them all
It’ll drive her out of her mind
And remember that Twi can’t control
Where the fanfic begins or ends
She’ll try to keep her sanity
With the help of her very best friends
Mane 6
Roll Call
Dash!
AJ!
Pinkie!
Celestia!
If you’re wondering how they eat and breathe
And other science facts
Then keep in mind it’s only a fic
You should really just relax
For Mystery Discord Theatre... 3000!
Discord: Ah, this shall indeed be fun. I’ve devised a way to have the fanfic read aloud by a disembodied voice. You can’t escape. Your piece of terror this week is a particularly spectacular horror fic. Ah, how I love revenge. It’s best served cold, with a nice helping of torture and grimdark. I prefer mental torture. Celly, however... Very little needs be said about that. Enjoy the fiction, my friends.
(A floating orb of red light begins to flash)
Twi: What’s that?
Discord: That, my little inmates, is the Fanfic Sign. You shall come to fear it. It begins to flash when your wonderfully artistic torture is about to begin. I borrowed the idea from some good friends of mine.
>What Lurks Within the Shadows (A Requiem of Darkness)
Celestia: Why, me, of course.
Applejack: Well, this ain’t too bad so far. The name isn’t exactly nice, though.
Twi: We’ve got quite the distance left to go, AJ. Don’t be too hopeful.
>…Everypony has a darkside that much is true.
Celestia: Yet some have a more... fun dark side than others. Like me.
Twilight: The rest of the fanfic is completely false. But since it’s fictional, is it thus true again?
>For some though, they don't realize that they even have one, until it is too late.
Twilight: So the upshot of this is that anypony can simply become evil at any time, and yet no one realizes this, ever?
>This is the story of a Pegasus named…Fluttershy.
Twi: Oh no.
>I must warn thee, however, that this tale is something that is not for the faint of heart. But, it is your choice whether to read on, or not. Enjoy… (Sinister laugh)
Twilight: This certainly doesn’t bode well. It’s only the disclaimer and already the author is taking perverse joy at having unsuspecting ponies read it.
>This night was another ordinary, boring, night as always. Angel, as well as the rest of the animals, was asleep.
Twilight: The only horror so far is the grammar.
>Fluttershy was upstairs in her bed, when something woke her.
Dash: The Bed Intruder!
>A soft voice, that was barely audible, began to speak.
Applejack: Wait a minute here. If it didn’t start talking yet, then how’d she wake up?
> "Fluttershy…" "Fluttershy…" The voice stopped. Then a minute later, the voice began again, louder this time, and sounded distorted, and, yet, familiar. "Fluttershy, wake up…"
Dash: The president has been kidnapped by ninjas!
Celestia: It’s an awfully polite rapist in a gas mask!
>She awoke, and looked around frantically, trying to figure out where the voice came from.
Twilight: But didn’t the silent voice just wake her two lines ago?
>"Wh- who's there?" she said, already trembling.
Celestia: She seems nervous for somepony just woken twice by a quiet, familiar voice.
>"Come outside…" said the voice. For some reason, it seemed that a strange force caused her to get out of bed, walk down the stairs and outside, all the while her whole body was shaking.
Dash: Seemed?
Twilight: So this mysterious force woke her up, knocked her out again, then started talking very quietly telling her to wake up. With bad grammar. Which worked. If it can control all her actions, then why didn’t...
Pinkie: Because that'd be no fun!
>It was a full moon, and the night was clear, but something was off.
Dash: The lights?
Applejack: The oven?
Celestia: The stars?
>There were no stars in the sky, just a large moon.
Celestia: I KNEW IT!
Twi: "A" large moon? Doesn't that imply that it's not the normal Equestrian moon?
>Even stranger, the moon was crimson red, the color of…blood. It shone brightly, causing the night sky to turn red as well.
Twilight: I’m quite certain that lunar discoloration can be caused by atmospheric particulates. Also, light does not work that way. It simply does not.
>Her eyes grew wide, with terror, at this terrifying sight, she shut her eyes, and hoped this was a dream.
Dash: She seems indecisive about the entire thing. First she wakes up, and then goes to sleep, then stares in terror at the terrifying sky, and then she shuts her eyes, also in terror, even though she woke up twice and so this can’t be a dream. Unless it’s Inception.
ALL: WE NEED TO GO DEEPER!
>Again, the voice spoke, much louder, and seemed to come from all around her. "Well, well, well. At last we meet, my dear Fluttershy" The voice sounded very familiar. Her eyes shot open, and grew wider with terror.
Twilight: So now she opens her eyes again, still in terror. How exactly does that work?
Dash: And if it’s her, but she’s not talking, then it’d have to be in her mind, but THIS MAKES NO SENSE.
>Her heart pounded in her chest, almost as if it was going to jump out of her chest.
Twilight: I had hoped her heart would pound in her chest as if it'd jump out of her leg.
>It was her voice, but it sounded, different. It was evil, and twisted. There was no sweetness or kindness with it, though. It was ice-cold, and eerily calm. Every word that voice spoke, she shivered, with fear.
Twilight: Comma overdose, much?
Dash: “With it, though”? So normal evil, twisted voices sound sweet and kind?
>"Wh- where are you?" she asked, her voice shaking. "Down here," said the voice. She did,
Twilight: Did what? Getting sloppier with the grammar, eh?
>and all she saw was her…shadow. The shadow moved in front of her, then took the form of a solid black Pegasus, which looked exactly like her, only, without the color. The only noticeable difference was its piercing red eyes, which seemed to stare right through her.
Applejack: Aw, this can't be good...
Twilight: So it looked like her except it has no color, and no color except red eyes. Just can’t make up his mind, can he.
>"Who are you?" she asked. "I'm you," said the shadow. "Well, not exactly. But, I will spare you the details, unless, you'd prefer to hear my tale."
Twilight: She didn’t guess that it was her by the fact that it looked and sounded exactly like her?
Dash: Still indecisive... I’m you, but I’m not, but there’s more to it.
>Fluttershy nodded. "Well, my name is Lazarus, I come from a place that is not of this plane, and I've been with you for a while now.
Celestia: We've been in a committed relationship for about a year, while you're asleep.
Twi: If one is to use a biblical name, at least ensure that it makes sense.
>Tell me, Fluttershy, when were you born? 20 years ago, was it?" Fluttershy nodded slowly.
Dash: Why can’t a demon inhabiting her mind remember her age? Why does it bother to keep her conscious of her actions at all?
Pinkie: Because it’s so much fun to let her watch herself murdering helpless ponies!
Twilight: So I suppose she was shocked into silence? But with this fic, you can’t expect anything normal.
>"That was the night, you gained my curse. You see, I am a demon, of sorts, and I attach myself to shadows, of anyone I deem fit, you, in particular." "Why me?" she asked.
Celestia: Your plot of course. No other plot can compare.
Twi: He means “anypony”.
>Lazarus "smiled". "Because, you're, weak-willed, but, you've grown stronger, I've been only able to influence you in minor ways. You know that stare you do? That is my doing, everything you have ever done, that was, mean, or not nice, was because of me.
Twilight: That’s the most incomprehensible line yet. And yet, I have no idea what that means. At all. Would she be even shyer without the helpful demon to help her assert herself?
>But tonight, is a special night. And why is that, Fluttershy?" Fluttershy shook her head.
Dash: At what? It’s not a special night, after all? That would fit with the indecisiveness we’ve otherwise seen.
> "Tonight, is the Blood Moon. We demons gain power from it, you see, Luna, who controls the moon, cannot on this night, because of our rulers magic, it overpowers hers, and lets him gain control.
Twilight: By Celestia, the grammar is actually getting worse.
Celestia: The grammar is perfectly fine over here, Twilight.
>The moon is red, because of the magic being used. And tonight, I gain full control of you, Fluttershy."
Dash: Side effects of demonic possession may include dry mouth, cramps, rash, desire to horribly murder innocents, and discolored moon. Demonic possession is not for everypony. Ask your doctor before use.
Celestia: Full control? Mm...
> Fluttershy gasped silently. "Every 20 years, it happens. This is first time it will happen to you."
Applejack: Now just wait a minute. That doesn’ make sense. How many other poor ponies have demons? And if it was affecting her every time else, then how come Twi couldn’t figure it out and save her?
Twi: "is first time"? We're dealing with a demon that’s got bad grammar, is horribly indecisive, looks just like poor Fluttershy, and is Russian. Truly, he fills me with fear.
>Fluttershy shook her head in disbelief; her eyes began to well with tears. "No, no you can't, do that." Lazarus chuckled, "Well, you've no choice. On this night, I must feed to stay alive. If I die, then you will. It's a symbiotic relationship, basically. Besides, it is only for tonight. Tomorrow, you won't remember a thing." Fluttershy started to back away, slowly. "No, I will never give in." she said bravely. Lazarus rolled her eyes. "You can fight all you want, but, it will not do you any good."
Celestia: Sort of like denying me my fun! I’ll have it anyway.
>The demons voice already began to sound weak, and raspy.
Twilight: Wait, why? WHY?
Applejack: I suppose the demon needs to find a smoother brand of cigarettes.
>Lazarus growled, and jumped at Fluttershy, hitting her then disappearing into her body.
Twi: Why does it bother disguising itself as her shadow if it can just ride inside her psyche?
>Instantly Fluttershy felt weak, and fell to the ground. Her body began to change, starting with her wings. They grew into claws, with three sharp points at the end. Her eyes began to glow an ethereal yellow, then the teeth grew into sharp fangs, her mane, became wild, and frayed. Finally, her cutie mark, the butterflies sort of ran together like wet paint, but didn't come off.
Twi: I don’t know where to start. First, why do her wings change? She can’t fly now. And glowing red eyes plus blue eyes equals glowing yellow eyes? What?
>Lazarus had fully taken over, and turned her, into a monster.
Twilight: ENOUGH WITH THE COMMAS!
>The demons voice, had changed, and sounded even more evil than before. On this night, Fluttershy would be known as…Demonshy. "Now, who shall I feast upon, this night?" said Demonshy.
Dash: Demon puberty is quite strenuous. Also, how can that voice get more evil?
Celestia: She should visit Lyra and Bon-Bon. I always "feast" quite well with them.
>She began to walk the streets, fire coming from her hooves, leaving black hoof-marks on the cobblestone streets. Sadly, the streets were empty, and everypony was asleep, but Demonshy was smart, she wouldn't just break into their houses like that.
Celestia: Well, why wouldn’t she? She’s in no real danger, they’re all asleep.
Twilight: I somehow think somepony would probably notice. Certain ponies are awake late.
>She growled in frustration and kept walking until she reached a familiar cloud-house, then smiled evilly, "Perfect."
Dash: I don’t like where this is going...
Applejack: Wait, wouldn’t she have to fly to get to a cloud-house? And didn’t her wings turn into claws?
>She managed to sneak in with no trouble at all. Rainbow Dash was fast asleep, she then heard a noise, and woke up to find Fluttershy standing by her bed. The blue Pegasus blinked for a sec.
Twi: Alright, well, I suppose she could sneak in, but then how does she wake up Dash just when she wants to? Also, the grammar is even worse.
>"Fluttershy, what are you doing here? It's late." Demonshy stood there, saying nothing. "Look, I'm going to have to ask you…"
Twi: To leave?
Celestia: Will you kiss me?
Dash: Will it go round in circles?
Applejack: TK-421, why aren’t you at your post?
Twilight: Wait, what?
AJ: Never mind.
>She stopped, and blinked again, and saw the changes of Fluttershy's body. "Flu-Fluttershy?"
Twilight: Such nice ears you have...
Celestia: Your plot is so much more attractive! We must celebrate!
Dash: I wish the plot of this story would improve.
>Demonshy smiled wide, baring her white fangs. Rainbow's heart began to pound. Demonshy swiped at her with a claw-wing.
Twi: So, first they’re wings, then claws, and then both. The author can’t seem to make up his mind.
>Rainbow Dash dodged nimbly, and took off out of her bedroom window.
Celestia: Fleeing the bedroom? She has no stamina?
>Flying as fast as she could, Rainbow headed for the Everfree Forest, with Demonshy close behind. She was now over the trees, and dove straight down, crashing through the forest canopy, and hit the ground with a thud.
Dash: This is idiotic. Why would I ever fly into the forest canopy when I’m the best flier in Equestria?
Twi: No, I assumed she would go “Boink”.
Celestia: Well, I think there’ll be more “Boink” soon.
>Rainbow got up, a shooting pain in her left wing. It was broken and now hearing Demonshy's voice. "Where are you?"
Twi: How could her wing possibly be hearing Demonshy? I don’t think the author understands how wings work.
Dash: I break my wing? WHY? I can crash gracefully! Awesomely even! This sounds like that horrid comfort fic that Discord tortured us with.
>The voice seemed to come from everywhere at once. A bush rustled, and Demonshy jumped out, hitting Rainbow with a thud, knocking her down. "Now, just hold still, and this will be quick, and painless." Demonshy used her claw-wings to hold her down.
Twi: Relax, I know CPR.
Celestia: Demonshy sure is a determined rapist. Nowhere near as skilled as I, however.
>Then quickly, tore at Rainbow's wings, shredding them, causing her to scream in pain. "I love it when you scream in agony." said Demonshy cruelly, giving a twisted laugh.
Celestia: She sure is kinky, just like me. I’d tap that.
>Rainbow Dash kicked with her back legs, knocking Demonshy off balance, then got up, and ran at half-gallop, deeper into the forest.
Pinkie Pie: Oh silly Dashie, don’t you know that it’s impolite to track blood everywhere? Wipe your feet!
Dash: But Pinkie, you can’t... but... it almost killed the other me! At least show some terror! You aren’t secretly thinking about murdering me, ARE YOU?! Well, ARE YOU?!
>Demonshy shook her head to clear it, and then laughed to herself, "I love a good chase."
Celestia: So do I!
>But, the moon was getting lower in sky.
Applejack: It’s just like in Full Pony Consequences.
>Rainbow Dash felt weak, from the blood loss, as she was running.
Twi: Wings usually don’t have that much blood flow, actually. The muscles are the main thing requiring significant amounts of blood, but those are closer to the base of the wing. Then again, the wings must be magic, because there’s no way wings that size could provide enough lift.
>Her legs got weak, and collapsed underneath her. Surely, she made it far enough away from Demonshy. She heard a sinister laugh come from in front of her. She looked up, and gave a breathless gasp.
Twi: How can you gasp without breathing?
>Demonshy kept laughing. "Rainbow Dash, it has been fun, but, your time is sadly up. You got lucky with that kick back there, which gave you a few more pointless minutes of life to run. So, as I said before, goodbye, Rainbow Dash." Demonshy knocked Rainbow onto her back, once >more, and pinned her down.
Celestia: Now she’s finally going to do her.
>She bared her white fangs, to instill pure terror into Rainbow Dash. Her claw-wings sliced open Rainbow's stomach; Rainbow screamed loudly and went hoarse.
Dash: I don’t feel so great (vomits).
>Demonshy devoured her intestines, entrails, and other bits, blood gushing everywhere, Rainbow screaming in pain and agony. Demonshy then ripped open Rainbow's chest, shattering her ribs.
Celestia: Even I’m not that kinky.
Twi: How could you shatter ribs with claws? Bones are usually broken by blunt force, which claws cannot exert.
(Dash collapses, quivering and whimpering.)
>Demonshy devoured almost everything, except for her still beating heart.
Dash: Clean your plate, dear, or you won’t get desert...
Celestia: Hearts are delicious. I don’t see why she wouldn’t like them.
Twilight: And just how do you know this?
Celestia: Uh... Experiments...
>"I'm sorry." said Demonshy, laughing sadistically.
Twilight: “This appendectomy does seem to have gone terribly wrong.”
>In one swipe, Demonshy tore out Rainbows heart, and ate it, whole...
Pinkie Pie: KANO WINS! FATALITY!
Twi: What in Equestria are you talking about, Pinkie?
Pinkie Pie: Mortal Kombat, of course. What else?
>The next morning, Fluttershy awoke, back to her normal self. Then, she saw, that her hooves and wings were covered in blood. Finally she saw the terrible, gruesome sight, of Rainbow Dash's massacred body, lying there, and void of all organs. "No!" she yelled, running over to Rainbow's dead body, and then sobbed heavily.
Pinkie Pie: (imitating Fluttershy) Aww, I didn’t get to eat the heart.
Applejack: Pinkie Pie, you are so random.
> "No. No. No." she repeated it for a while, that's all she could say.
Applejack: Bison, however, says yes.
>Lazarus laughed, which seem to come from everywhere. "You, you, monster," Fluttershy yelled. "Oh, but I'm not the monster here, you are," said Lazarus. Fluttershy gasped, and kept crying and sobbing, mourning the loss of her friend… "Goodbye, Rainbow Dash." said Fluttershy, closing Rainbow's eyes for the last time, forever.
END.
Celestia: Can we do shipping next?
Discord: Well, how was that lovely piece of fiction, my little ponies? And yes, Celly, we can do shipping next. I’ll give you some time to recover, and then we can have more fun.
Celly: You’ll never get away with this!
Discord: On the contrary, I believe I will. I hold all the cards, and all of the fanfiction too. I can compress time here, too, and by the time your dear sister figures out what’s happened, it won’t be too late, but I’ll have taken my revenge.
Well, fillies and gentlecolts, that was it. I never said it’d be any good. But of course, the only way it’ll improve is through criticism. And so again, I heartily encourage that. Ignoring my self-deprecating remarks and giving me positive commentary if it’s deserved wouldn’t hurt either, really. I know that certain things weren’t properly explained, some jokes were forced, and everypony’s out of character horribly, but I do my best. Again, the best compliment you can make is constructive criticism. Also, on a somewhat random note, if someone’s interested in assisting me with the MSTing process, it’d be appreciated. One man’s creative mind and biting wit only go so far.
Author’s note: As this fic is written in imitation of classic text MST style, it can be somewhat odd to read if you’ve no experience with the type of fiction. Text in parentheses is description of events and locations. Dialogue, rather than being in quotes, is preceded by the speaker’s name and a colon. Not their colon, that would be disgusting. The actual text of the original fanfiction is proceeded on each line by a > mark.
(View of exterior of Ponyville library)
(...Noises... audible)
Discord: Well, it seems dear Celly is occupied at the moment. This should be a perfect opportunity to get my revenge and send her and her friends TO THE MOOONNN!
(Discord walks towards library, camera remains static.)
(Animated intro begins.)
In a parallel dimension
Filled with ponies
There was a mare named Twilight
Not too different from you or me
She lived in a town called Ponyville
And learned about the magic of friendship
She did a fine job and made lots of friends
But Discord didn’t like her so he sent her to the mooon...
(Discord)
I’ll send her cheesy fanfic
The worst I can find
She’ll just have to read them all
It’ll drive her out of her mind
And remember that Twi can’t control
Where the fanfic begins or ends
She’ll try to keep her sanity
With the help of her very best friends
Mane 6
Roll Call
Dash!
AJ!
Pinkie!
Celestia!
If you’re wondering how they eat and breathe
And other science facts
Then keep in mind it’s only a fic
You should really just relax
For Mystery Discord Theatre... 3000!
Discord: Ah, this shall indeed be fun. I’ve devised a way to have the fanfic read aloud by a disembodied voice. You can’t escape. Your piece of terror this week is a particularly spectacular horror fic. Ah, how I love revenge. It’s best served cold, with a nice helping of torture and grimdark. I prefer mental torture. Celly, however... Very little needs be said about that. Enjoy the fiction, my friends.
(A floating orb of red light begins to flash)
Twi: What’s that?
Discord: That, my little inmates, is the Fanfic Sign. You shall come to fear it. It begins to flash when your wonderfully artistic torture is about to begin. I borrowed the idea from some good friends of mine.
>What Lurks Within the Shadows (A Requiem of Darkness)
Celestia: Why, me, of course.
Applejack: Well, this ain’t too bad so far. The name isn’t exactly nice, though.
Twi: We’ve got quite the distance left to go, AJ. Don’t be too hopeful.
>…Everypony has a darkside that much is true.
Celestia: Yet some have a more... fun dark side than others. Like me.
Twilight: The rest of the fanfic is completely false. But since it’s fictional, is it thus true again?
>For some though, they don't realize that they even have one, until it is too late.
Twilight: So the upshot of this is that anypony can simply become evil at any time, and yet no one realizes this, ever?
>This is the story of a Pegasus named…Fluttershy.
Twi: Oh no.
>I must warn thee, however, that this tale is something that is not for the faint of heart. But, it is your choice whether to read on, or not. Enjoy… (Sinister laugh)
Twilight: This certainly doesn’t bode well. It’s only the disclaimer and already the author is taking perverse joy at having unsuspecting ponies read it.
>This night was another ordinary, boring, night as always. Angel, as well as the rest of the animals, was asleep.
Twilight: The only horror so far is the grammar.
>Fluttershy was upstairs in her bed, when something woke her.
Dash: The Bed Intruder!
>A soft voice, that was barely audible, began to speak.
Applejack: Wait a minute here. If it didn’t start talking yet, then how’d she wake up?
> "Fluttershy…" "Fluttershy…" The voice stopped. Then a minute later, the voice began again, louder this time, and sounded distorted, and, yet, familiar. "Fluttershy, wake up…"
Dash: The president has been kidnapped by ninjas!
Celestia: It’s an awfully polite rapist in a gas mask!
>She awoke, and looked around frantically, trying to figure out where the voice came from.
Twilight: But didn’t the silent voice just wake her two lines ago?
>"Wh- who's there?" she said, already trembling.
Celestia: She seems nervous for somepony just woken twice by a quiet, familiar voice.
>"Come outside…" said the voice. For some reason, it seemed that a strange force caused her to get out of bed, walk down the stairs and outside, all the while her whole body was shaking.
Dash: Seemed?
Twilight: So this mysterious force woke her up, knocked her out again, then started talking very quietly telling her to wake up. With bad grammar. Which worked. If it can control all her actions, then why didn’t...
Pinkie: Because that'd be no fun!
>It was a full moon, and the night was clear, but something was off.
Dash: The lights?
Applejack: The oven?
Celestia: The stars?
>There were no stars in the sky, just a large moon.
Celestia: I KNEW IT!
Twi: "A" large moon? Doesn't that imply that it's not the normal Equestrian moon?
>Even stranger, the moon was crimson red, the color of…blood. It shone brightly, causing the night sky to turn red as well.
Twilight: I’m quite certain that lunar discoloration can be caused by atmospheric particulates. Also, light does not work that way. It simply does not.
>Her eyes grew wide, with terror, at this terrifying sight, she shut her eyes, and hoped this was a dream.
Dash: She seems indecisive about the entire thing. First she wakes up, and then goes to sleep, then stares in terror at the terrifying sky, and then she shuts her eyes, also in terror, even though she woke up twice and so this can’t be a dream. Unless it’s Inception.
ALL: WE NEED TO GO DEEPER!
>Again, the voice spoke, much louder, and seemed to come from all around her. "Well, well, well. At last we meet, my dear Fluttershy" The voice sounded very familiar. Her eyes shot open, and grew wider with terror.
Twilight: So now she opens her eyes again, still in terror. How exactly does that work?
Dash: And if it’s her, but she’s not talking, then it’d have to be in her mind, but THIS MAKES NO SENSE.
>Her heart pounded in her chest, almost as if it was going to jump out of her chest.
Twilight: I had hoped her heart would pound in her chest as if it'd jump out of her leg.
>It was her voice, but it sounded, different. It was evil, and twisted. There was no sweetness or kindness with it, though. It was ice-cold, and eerily calm. Every word that voice spoke, she shivered, with fear.
Twilight: Comma overdose, much?
Dash: “With it, though”? So normal evil, twisted voices sound sweet and kind?
>"Wh- where are you?" she asked, her voice shaking. "Down here," said the voice. She did,
Twilight: Did what? Getting sloppier with the grammar, eh?
>and all she saw was her…shadow. The shadow moved in front of her, then took the form of a solid black Pegasus, which looked exactly like her, only, without the color. The only noticeable difference was its piercing red eyes, which seemed to stare right through her.
Applejack: Aw, this can't be good...
Twilight: So it looked like her except it has no color, and no color except red eyes. Just can’t make up his mind, can he.
>"Who are you?" she asked. "I'm you," said the shadow. "Well, not exactly. But, I will spare you the details, unless, you'd prefer to hear my tale."
Twilight: She didn’t guess that it was her by the fact that it looked and sounded exactly like her?
Dash: Still indecisive... I’m you, but I’m not, but there’s more to it.
>Fluttershy nodded. "Well, my name is Lazarus, I come from a place that is not of this plane, and I've been with you for a while now.
Celestia: We've been in a committed relationship for about a year, while you're asleep.
Twi: If one is to use a biblical name, at least ensure that it makes sense.
>Tell me, Fluttershy, when were you born? 20 years ago, was it?" Fluttershy nodded slowly.
Dash: Why can’t a demon inhabiting her mind remember her age? Why does it bother to keep her conscious of her actions at all?
Pinkie: Because it’s so much fun to let her watch herself murdering helpless ponies!
Twilight: So I suppose she was shocked into silence? But with this fic, you can’t expect anything normal.
>"That was the night, you gained my curse. You see, I am a demon, of sorts, and I attach myself to shadows, of anyone I deem fit, you, in particular." "Why me?" she asked.
Celestia: Your plot of course. No other plot can compare.
Twi: He means “anypony”.
>Lazarus "smiled". "Because, you're, weak-willed, but, you've grown stronger, I've been only able to influence you in minor ways. You know that stare you do? That is my doing, everything you have ever done, that was, mean, or not nice, was because of me.
Twilight: That’s the most incomprehensible line yet. And yet, I have no idea what that means. At all. Would she be even shyer without the helpful demon to help her assert herself?
>But tonight, is a special night. And why is that, Fluttershy?" Fluttershy shook her head.
Dash: At what? It’s not a special night, after all? That would fit with the indecisiveness we’ve otherwise seen.
> "Tonight, is the Blood Moon. We demons gain power from it, you see, Luna, who controls the moon, cannot on this night, because of our rulers magic, it overpowers hers, and lets him gain control.
Twilight: By Celestia, the grammar is actually getting worse.
Celestia: The grammar is perfectly fine over here, Twilight.
>The moon is red, because of the magic being used. And tonight, I gain full control of you, Fluttershy."
Dash: Side effects of demonic possession may include dry mouth, cramps, rash, desire to horribly murder innocents, and discolored moon. Demonic possession is not for everypony. Ask your doctor before use.
Celestia: Full control? Mm...
> Fluttershy gasped silently. "Every 20 years, it happens. This is first time it will happen to you."
Applejack: Now just wait a minute. That doesn’ make sense. How many other poor ponies have demons? And if it was affecting her every time else, then how come Twi couldn’t figure it out and save her?
Twi: "is first time"? We're dealing with a demon that’s got bad grammar, is horribly indecisive, looks just like poor Fluttershy, and is Russian. Truly, he fills me with fear.
>Fluttershy shook her head in disbelief; her eyes began to well with tears. "No, no you can't, do that." Lazarus chuckled, "Well, you've no choice. On this night, I must feed to stay alive. If I die, then you will. It's a symbiotic relationship, basically. Besides, it is only for tonight. Tomorrow, you won't remember a thing." Fluttershy started to back away, slowly. "No, I will never give in." she said bravely. Lazarus rolled her eyes. "You can fight all you want, but, it will not do you any good."
Celestia: Sort of like denying me my fun! I’ll have it anyway.
>The demons voice already began to sound weak, and raspy.
Twilight: Wait, why? WHY?
Applejack: I suppose the demon needs to find a smoother brand of cigarettes.
>Lazarus growled, and jumped at Fluttershy, hitting her then disappearing into her body.
Twi: Why does it bother disguising itself as her shadow if it can just ride inside her psyche?
>Instantly Fluttershy felt weak, and fell to the ground. Her body began to change, starting with her wings. They grew into claws, with three sharp points at the end. Her eyes began to glow an ethereal yellow, then the teeth grew into sharp fangs, her mane, became wild, and frayed. Finally, her cutie mark, the butterflies sort of ran together like wet paint, but didn't come off.
Twi: I don’t know where to start. First, why do her wings change? She can’t fly now. And glowing red eyes plus blue eyes equals glowing yellow eyes? What?
>Lazarus had fully taken over, and turned her, into a monster.
Twilight: ENOUGH WITH THE COMMAS!
>The demons voice, had changed, and sounded even more evil than before. On this night, Fluttershy would be known as…Demonshy. "Now, who shall I feast upon, this night?" said Demonshy.
Dash: Demon puberty is quite strenuous. Also, how can that voice get more evil?
Celestia: She should visit Lyra and Bon-Bon. I always "feast" quite well with them.
>She began to walk the streets, fire coming from her hooves, leaving black hoof-marks on the cobblestone streets. Sadly, the streets were empty, and everypony was asleep, but Demonshy was smart, she wouldn't just break into their houses like that.
Celestia: Well, why wouldn’t she? She’s in no real danger, they’re all asleep.
Twilight: I somehow think somepony would probably notice. Certain ponies are awake late.
>She growled in frustration and kept walking until she reached a familiar cloud-house, then smiled evilly, "Perfect."
Dash: I don’t like where this is going...
Applejack: Wait, wouldn’t she have to fly to get to a cloud-house? And didn’t her wings turn into claws?
>She managed to sneak in with no trouble at all. Rainbow Dash was fast asleep, she then heard a noise, and woke up to find Fluttershy standing by her bed. The blue Pegasus blinked for a sec.
Twi: Alright, well, I suppose she could sneak in, but then how does she wake up Dash just when she wants to? Also, the grammar is even worse.
>"Fluttershy, what are you doing here? It's late." Demonshy stood there, saying nothing. "Look, I'm going to have to ask you…"
Twi: To leave?
Celestia: Will you kiss me?
Dash: Will it go round in circles?
Applejack: TK-421, why aren’t you at your post?
Twilight: Wait, what?
AJ: Never mind.
>She stopped, and blinked again, and saw the changes of Fluttershy's body. "Flu-Fluttershy?"
Twilight: Such nice ears you have...
Celestia: Your plot is so much more attractive! We must celebrate!
Dash: I wish the plot of this story would improve.
>Demonshy smiled wide, baring her white fangs. Rainbow's heart began to pound. Demonshy swiped at her with a claw-wing.
Twi: So, first they’re wings, then claws, and then both. The author can’t seem to make up his mind.
>Rainbow Dash dodged nimbly, and took off out of her bedroom window.
Celestia: Fleeing the bedroom? She has no stamina?
>Flying as fast as she could, Rainbow headed for the Everfree Forest, with Demonshy close behind. She was now over the trees, and dove straight down, crashing through the forest canopy, and hit the ground with a thud.
Dash: This is idiotic. Why would I ever fly into the forest canopy when I’m the best flier in Equestria?
Twi: No, I assumed she would go “Boink”.
Celestia: Well, I think there’ll be more “Boink” soon.
>Rainbow got up, a shooting pain in her left wing. It was broken and now hearing Demonshy's voice. "Where are you?"
Twi: How could her wing possibly be hearing Demonshy? I don’t think the author understands how wings work.
Dash: I break my wing? WHY? I can crash gracefully! Awesomely even! This sounds like that horrid comfort fic that Discord tortured us with.
>The voice seemed to come from everywhere at once. A bush rustled, and Demonshy jumped out, hitting Rainbow with a thud, knocking her down. "Now, just hold still, and this will be quick, and painless." Demonshy used her claw-wings to hold her down.
Twi: Relax, I know CPR.
Celestia: Demonshy sure is a determined rapist. Nowhere near as skilled as I, however.
>Then quickly, tore at Rainbow's wings, shredding them, causing her to scream in pain. "I love it when you scream in agony." said Demonshy cruelly, giving a twisted laugh.
Celestia: She sure is kinky, just like me. I’d tap that.
>Rainbow Dash kicked with her back legs, knocking Demonshy off balance, then got up, and ran at half-gallop, deeper into the forest.
Pinkie Pie: Oh silly Dashie, don’t you know that it’s impolite to track blood everywhere? Wipe your feet!
Dash: But Pinkie, you can’t... but... it almost killed the other me! At least show some terror! You aren’t secretly thinking about murdering me, ARE YOU?! Well, ARE YOU?!
>Demonshy shook her head to clear it, and then laughed to herself, "I love a good chase."
Celestia: So do I!
>But, the moon was getting lower in sky.
Applejack: It’s just like in Full Pony Consequences.
>Rainbow Dash felt weak, from the blood loss, as she was running.
Twi: Wings usually don’t have that much blood flow, actually. The muscles are the main thing requiring significant amounts of blood, but those are closer to the base of the wing. Then again, the wings must be magic, because there’s no way wings that size could provide enough lift.
>Her legs got weak, and collapsed underneath her. Surely, she made it far enough away from Demonshy. She heard a sinister laugh come from in front of her. She looked up, and gave a breathless gasp.
Twi: How can you gasp without breathing?
>Demonshy kept laughing. "Rainbow Dash, it has been fun, but, your time is sadly up. You got lucky with that kick back there, which gave you a few more pointless minutes of life to run. So, as I said before, goodbye, Rainbow Dash." Demonshy knocked Rainbow onto her back, once >more, and pinned her down.
Celestia: Now she’s finally going to do her.
>She bared her white fangs, to instill pure terror into Rainbow Dash. Her claw-wings sliced open Rainbow's stomach; Rainbow screamed loudly and went hoarse.
Dash: I don’t feel so great (vomits).
>Demonshy devoured her intestines, entrails, and other bits, blood gushing everywhere, Rainbow screaming in pain and agony. Demonshy then ripped open Rainbow's chest, shattering her ribs.
Celestia: Even I’m not that kinky.
Twi: How could you shatter ribs with claws? Bones are usually broken by blunt force, which claws cannot exert.
(Dash collapses, quivering and whimpering.)
>Demonshy devoured almost everything, except for her still beating heart.
Dash: Clean your plate, dear, or you won’t get desert...
Celestia: Hearts are delicious. I don’t see why she wouldn’t like them.
Twilight: And just how do you know this?
Celestia: Uh... Experiments...
>"I'm sorry." said Demonshy, laughing sadistically.
Twilight: “This appendectomy does seem to have gone terribly wrong.”
>In one swipe, Demonshy tore out Rainbows heart, and ate it, whole...
Pinkie Pie: KANO WINS! FATALITY!
Twi: What in Equestria are you talking about, Pinkie?
Pinkie Pie: Mortal Kombat, of course. What else?
>The next morning, Fluttershy awoke, back to her normal self. Then, she saw, that her hooves and wings were covered in blood. Finally she saw the terrible, gruesome sight, of Rainbow Dash's massacred body, lying there, and void of all organs. "No!" she yelled, running over to Rainbow's dead body, and then sobbed heavily.
Pinkie Pie: (imitating Fluttershy) Aww, I didn’t get to eat the heart.
Applejack: Pinkie Pie, you are so random.
> "No. No. No." she repeated it for a while, that's all she could say.
Applejack: Bison, however, says yes.
>Lazarus laughed, which seem to come from everywhere. "You, you, monster," Fluttershy yelled. "Oh, but I'm not the monster here, you are," said Lazarus. Fluttershy gasped, and kept crying and sobbing, mourning the loss of her friend… "Goodbye, Rainbow Dash." said Fluttershy, closing Rainbow's eyes for the last time, forever.
END.
Celestia: Can we do shipping next?
Discord: Well, how was that lovely piece of fiction, my little ponies? And yes, Celly, we can do shipping next. I’ll give you some time to recover, and then we can have more fun.
Celly: You’ll never get away with this!
Discord: On the contrary, I believe I will. I hold all the cards, and all of the fanfiction too. I can compress time here, too, and by the time your dear sister figures out what’s happened, it won’t be too late, but I’ll have taken my revenge.
Well, fillies and gentlecolts, that was it. I never said it’d be any good. But of course, the only way it’ll improve is through criticism. And so again, I heartily encourage that. Ignoring my self-deprecating remarks and giving me positive commentary if it’s deserved wouldn’t hurt either, really. I know that certain things weren’t properly explained, some jokes were forced, and everypony’s out of character horribly, but I do my best. Again, the best compliment you can make is constructive criticism. Also, on a somewhat random note, if someone’s interested in assisting me with the MSTing process, it’d be appreciated. One man’s creative mind and biting wit only go so far.